Monday, March 10, 2008

Things to do when you're in The Gambia



  • Get dragged to the police in the middle of the night by an old Guinean meat seller for failure to comply to his random post-prep price change.
  • Decline eating the meat after the police help pay for it because it tastes like sweat.
  • Forward your ‘love texts’ to a friend so that he may use them on the girl he’s courting.
  • Wake up the caretaker who is sleeping under your desk and throw his cigarettes out the door (for added emphasis).
  • Inform impertinent schoolboys that you left some pens and bottles ‘over that hill’ and watch them run in vain under the blazing sun.
  • Notice bits of your garbage popping up as useful items throughout the village.
  • Fear that people know the dish soap bottle they are drinking from was your castoff and are eyeing your backyard for more treasures.
  • Allow your ceiling to disintegrate into termite dust, despite the loving paint job it received from your site-mates.
  • Tally the appearances of a certain president’s image on local television in a given hour. (23)
  • Enlist small children to run your errands with the coveted reward of liking them.
  • Explain in Mandinka why you can never see the people on the laugh track while watching "Keeping up Appearances" on an old black and white.

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