Headlines

(Arieh's Cat: How best to anthropomorphise her expression, forlorn?)

• Up to five blankets and counting; pondering possibility of being crushed by weight of bedding simply trying to keep warm.
• Receive an inquiry over whether time in Africa impedes blood-donation on second party's part- not flattered but better able to relate to lepers.
• Hoping to be indoctrinated by the "ideology of hedonism" purportedly brought on by colonialism as referred to in student's paper.
  
• Also in related news, discover that the reading of student papers is best left to the latter part of the caffeine-alcohol rotation.
  
• Thankful to conservative talk radio for continuing to bridge the literacy gap.
• Anxious to see the enlightened math and economic principal that will magically create 33,000 jobs by cutting sales tax in half.
• While unimpressed with recent fashion developments, am happy that the men continuing to wear their girlfriends' pants have opted to balance their looks with beards.
• Search continues for a culturally relevant Halloween costume that isn't Snookie or Lady Gaga.